Screenwriter Blog #8 - Story 7/Scene 1/Painted Springs - Story 8/Scene 5/Sambuca
It was supposed to rain today. We had written the scene twice. Once for rain. And once for no rain. We really had little cause to complain. The weather had been nearly perfect for the entire shoot. I was really hoping it wouldn't rain today, though. Not because I didn't want anyone to get wet (in fact, the scene, if shot while raining, would have required Nat to get wet, very wet.) I just liked the shot list better in the "no rain" scene. It rained early in the morning, but then started to taper off. Things were good.
Yesterday's drive was long, but today's was going to be even longer. And trickier. Doug, Nat, and I had each been out to Painted Springs, but that in no way insured we could find our way back. And then there were the people who had never been out there before. About half way to Painted Springs I received a call from Andrea. She wasn't lost, she just wasn't there yet; and in surroundings like these it's better to make sure you're headed in the right direction. I tried to talk her into view of the two Longhorns at the entrance and she and her husband soon made it to set.
It wasn't raining now, but the rain had certainly left its mark. There was mud everywhere. No one was really prepared. Except for Doug. Doug had on waders. Waders that soon became the envy of everyone.
We pulled out all the equipment and started to look for a spot to set up base. This was and is a working farm and I wasn't sure that anyone here knew of our arriving. I wanted to make sure to stay out of their way, but also set us up in a position where we could get the most work done.
I was able to track someone down, explain exactly what we were doing here, and then went back to helping load things in. We had decided to set up camp right outside of some of the barn. Brandon soon arrived and we unloaded the jib.
The barn
We had a lot to shoot today. We not only had to have the brothers interact, we also had 4 flashbacks. Plus, everyone was on a different schedule. Brandon needed to be out by noon, Steve by 2:30, and Michele by 4-4:30. Plus, we really wanted to get some good jib shots today. Once again we were working in an extremely visually stimulating environment and wanted to do our best to capture it.
We decided to shoot the Brandon and Nat scenes first. I really wanted to get a shot of Nat staring out, from the loft, as Brandon arrives. I wanted their initial conversation to take place in that position; Nat looking down at Brandon and Brandon looking up at Nat. Not only did I like the way the shot looked, I really liked what it said about the brothers' relationship. Plus, we were ending the short with a shot where Nat was looking up at Brandon. I was really happy it wasn't raining. It meant we could get this shot.
We set things up, got a few jib shots, and then had Brandon start driving the truck in. We got it within a few takes and then moved on.
Set up in the morning always took us the longest. It never failed. We always took a long time to set up, but were then able to quickly roll through shots. We were working the same today, but unfortunately our schedule had changed. We still had shots to get with Brandon (who had to be out of here shortly) and we were still setting up.
We moved Nat and Brandon into the truck and started the meat of their dialogue. If I learned anything, it's that horses can be very loud. Horses really set the locale, but they're not always your best friend when shooting dialogue. We had a horse whiny, as if on cue, in almost every take.
We finally got through these shots and moved onto more jib shots. We wanted to shoot the truck arriving and leaving. We needed some establishing shots for the entire short and I was hoping we would get something out of these that would serve as such.
The jib is not the easiest thing to maneuver. We needed one person on the jib, plus someone else to carry the monitor as the jib moved (there was a glare anytime we tried to use the lcd screen.) We got it set up and started to work on the pacing. We basically had Brandon drive in (with Nat hidden in various places of the truck so as not to be seen) and then Brandon and Nat drive out. Over and over again.
It was nearing noon and we had to get Brandon out of there so he could go gather stories. We got what we needed, tore down the jib, and sent him on his way.
At about this time lunch arrived. So we broke.
As stated, this scene was very complicated. Lots of setups with lots of different actors. I felt bad. Half the day was through, and half our actors had been waiting around all morning. I tried to hurry to get things moving along.
We decided to shoot Steve's scenes next. We needed Steve to confront Nat. we decided Nat and David Wagner would be pitching horseshoes as this occurred. We would glide Steve in and then have the conversation begin.
Making sure the horseshoes were safe
Steve was great. He was always on his mark and always had his lines down. He had been a Joel recommendation and I was extremely happy.
At about this time it started to get really windy. It didn't hurt things visually (not much to see blowing,) but it was very loud. We did what we could to fix this and tried to continue shooting. Nick had really thrown himself in to helping get problems fixed (he was a big help with the jib) and this was no different. He and David worked through this problem and we continued on.
We took the scene from a few different angles. I was really happy with the interaction we were getting from Steve and Nat and I knew this was going to be great. We finally got all we needed and we released Steve.
We still had three more flashbacks to shoot and it was getting late. We decided to cut shots of Michele stealing the money (and therefore one of the flashbacks;) deciding that this could be implied.
Michele had already been in makeup with Andrea (it was great to finally get to see Andrea working on set. Both her talent and her energy had really stepped things up) and so we moved on to the first flashback.
This required Nat to be working and for Michele to be in his way. This was the third time I had worked with Michele and she had always been great. I knew I could ask her to practically do anything and she would get it done. For this scene, we basically just needed her to walk into the room and sit on some hay bales. Sounds pretty simple. But it's all about the walking and the sitting. We had to imply that she had a crush on Nat and Nat wanted nothing to do with her. All without dialogue.
The bales of hay
We moved back up to the hay loft. We decided Nat could appear to be working (it really was a good deal of work. Some of these hay bales are pretty heavy) by moving the hay bales from one pile to another. We set it up and got our shots.
We were running late and we still had one flashback to go. We had Nat and Michele change clothes and move into the apartment in the barn. We had to work fast. The sun was setting, changing our light at every minute. We crowded everyone into the room, set up two cameras, and started shooting. Once again our trusty wad of money came into play. We got what we needed and hurried Michele out of there. As we packed up, Doug went off to get some B roll.
Inside the barn
We were all packed up and ready to leave when Doug suggested we take a ride in the paddle boat (there's a paddle boat.) We said okay. It's a 4 person paddle boat and so David, Doug, Nat and I all piled in. It might be built for 4 people, but it tended to float really funny. I felt like we might sink at any moment. Anyway, we took it around the lake a bit and then returned to dry land and our cars.
The pond
I didn't know what kind of stories to expect tonight. The team had gathered at Bobby's Idle hour. I've spent some time in bars and heard a lot of stories in bars. Either you get something magical or some meanderings or a mixture of both. But you always get something colorful.
We started watching and we could tell right off we were getting some great stories. I think as a whole these were probably the best group of stories we got. They sounded lived in, practiced, and sincere. Several stories stood out. And I think the one we choose probably stood out the most. It wasn't the best story structurally (it was more Brandon asking a lot of questions than someone telling a story,) but the content was practically unlike anything we had heard in the project. I think we were all initially taken aback to think that someone would actually tell this story and that the person telling this story had actually performed these actions.
We debated on whether or not to use this story as opposed to what else we had to choose from. It fit our scene pretty well, but so did some of the other stories. Still, we thought it might be interesting to use this story. Luke seemed hesitant. This would be a hard song for him to write, especially with who he was writing for. I was a little hesitant too. I didn't want to use this story without justification and just for shock.
We had to make a decision though. We weighed everything again and decided to go with the story.
It was the story of a man who's niece had been molested. The molester was convicted and served 19 months in prison. The man telling this story waited for the molester to get out of prison and then beat him to death. He served 7 years of a life sentence.
It was pretty heavy content. This was scene 5 and we had definitely wanted conflict here. We needed John to really bring out all his issues. We were to be shooting at Sambuca, a restaurant.
So, this is what we pulled out of the story.
Some wrongdoing has been done - Jordan has "stolen" John's song.
Someone has been punished - We decided to have John be the one who was sent away; a sort of self imposed exile.
There is a trial - Some fans come up to Jordan and John while they sit at the restaurant. John starts listing and insinuating Jordan's faults.
There is waiting for revenge - It would appear as if this is the first time John has really spoken this way about this subject to Jordan. He has been holding it in for a long time.
The punishment is severe - John crucifies Jordan with his words. At one point he basically destroys Jordan (or at least how he defines himself) by accusing him of not being his brother.
There is punishment for these actions - John's exclamations make it all the more harder, and maybe even impossible, for he and Jordan to reconcile.
There is potential that a life sentence will not be served - By the end of Nat's speech he sounds more hurt than angry, this maybe paving the way for some reconciliation.
We went to work. We needed Nat and Brandon, but also fans. Nat suggested we call Theresa Meeker. It sounded like a good suggestion and she was available.
I set to writing a first draft of the scene. After getting one finished I fell asleep. Nat was also working on a draft.
I woke up the next morning and took a look at Nat's draft. I didn't like it. I felt like he wasn't really saying much and his character was mostly talking at Jordan. Nat argued for what he had written and then he performed it for me. It made all the difference. It made me see these words did mean something; especially when spoken by Nat.
We decided to use my buildup and insinuations, then use all of Nat's speech directed at Jordan, and then finish with my two last lines.
It read great. I was really happy with what we had and really upset with myself for jumping so quickly to an unwarranted conclusion. It really opened my eyes (again) to the way Nat wrote and how well he could especially write for this character.
Yesterday's drive was long, but today's was going to be even longer. And trickier. Doug, Nat, and I had each been out to Painted Springs, but that in no way insured we could find our way back. And then there were the people who had never been out there before. About half way to Painted Springs I received a call from Andrea. She wasn't lost, she just wasn't there yet; and in surroundings like these it's better to make sure you're headed in the right direction. I tried to talk her into view of the two Longhorns at the entrance and she and her husband soon made it to set.
It wasn't raining now, but the rain had certainly left its mark. There was mud everywhere. No one was really prepared. Except for Doug. Doug had on waders. Waders that soon became the envy of everyone.
We pulled out all the equipment and started to look for a spot to set up base. This was and is a working farm and I wasn't sure that anyone here knew of our arriving. I wanted to make sure to stay out of their way, but also set us up in a position where we could get the most work done.
I was able to track someone down, explain exactly what we were doing here, and then went back to helping load things in. We had decided to set up camp right outside of some of the barn. Brandon soon arrived and we unloaded the jib.
The barn
We had a lot to shoot today. We not only had to have the brothers interact, we also had 4 flashbacks. Plus, everyone was on a different schedule. Brandon needed to be out by noon, Steve by 2:30, and Michele by 4-4:30. Plus, we really wanted to get some good jib shots today. Once again we were working in an extremely visually stimulating environment and wanted to do our best to capture it.
We decided to shoot the Brandon and Nat scenes first. I really wanted to get a shot of Nat staring out, from the loft, as Brandon arrives. I wanted their initial conversation to take place in that position; Nat looking down at Brandon and Brandon looking up at Nat. Not only did I like the way the shot looked, I really liked what it said about the brothers' relationship. Plus, we were ending the short with a shot where Nat was looking up at Brandon. I was really happy it wasn't raining. It meant we could get this shot.
We set things up, got a few jib shots, and then had Brandon start driving the truck in. We got it within a few takes and then moved on.
Set up in the morning always took us the longest. It never failed. We always took a long time to set up, but were then able to quickly roll through shots. We were working the same today, but unfortunately our schedule had changed. We still had shots to get with Brandon (who had to be out of here shortly) and we were still setting up.
We moved Nat and Brandon into the truck and started the meat of their dialogue. If I learned anything, it's that horses can be very loud. Horses really set the locale, but they're not always your best friend when shooting dialogue. We had a horse whiny, as if on cue, in almost every take.
We finally got through these shots and moved onto more jib shots. We wanted to shoot the truck arriving and leaving. We needed some establishing shots for the entire short and I was hoping we would get something out of these that would serve as such.
The jib is not the easiest thing to maneuver. We needed one person on the jib, plus someone else to carry the monitor as the jib moved (there was a glare anytime we tried to use the lcd screen.) We got it set up and started to work on the pacing. We basically had Brandon drive in (with Nat hidden in various places of the truck so as not to be seen) and then Brandon and Nat drive out. Over and over again.
It was nearing noon and we had to get Brandon out of there so he could go gather stories. We got what we needed, tore down the jib, and sent him on his way.
At about this time lunch arrived. So we broke.
As stated, this scene was very complicated. Lots of setups with lots of different actors. I felt bad. Half the day was through, and half our actors had been waiting around all morning. I tried to hurry to get things moving along.
We decided to shoot Steve's scenes next. We needed Steve to confront Nat. we decided Nat and David Wagner would be pitching horseshoes as this occurred. We would glide Steve in and then have the conversation begin.
Making sure the horseshoes were safe
Steve was great. He was always on his mark and always had his lines down. He had been a Joel recommendation and I was extremely happy.
At about this time it started to get really windy. It didn't hurt things visually (not much to see blowing,) but it was very loud. We did what we could to fix this and tried to continue shooting. Nick had really thrown himself in to helping get problems fixed (he was a big help with the jib) and this was no different. He and David worked through this problem and we continued on.
We took the scene from a few different angles. I was really happy with the interaction we were getting from Steve and Nat and I knew this was going to be great. We finally got all we needed and we released Steve.
We still had three more flashbacks to shoot and it was getting late. We decided to cut shots of Michele stealing the money (and therefore one of the flashbacks;) deciding that this could be implied.
Michele had already been in makeup with Andrea (it was great to finally get to see Andrea working on set. Both her talent and her energy had really stepped things up) and so we moved on to the first flashback.
This required Nat to be working and for Michele to be in his way. This was the third time I had worked with Michele and she had always been great. I knew I could ask her to practically do anything and she would get it done. For this scene, we basically just needed her to walk into the room and sit on some hay bales. Sounds pretty simple. But it's all about the walking and the sitting. We had to imply that she had a crush on Nat and Nat wanted nothing to do with her. All without dialogue.
The bales of hay
We moved back up to the hay loft. We decided Nat could appear to be working (it really was a good deal of work. Some of these hay bales are pretty heavy) by moving the hay bales from one pile to another. We set it up and got our shots.
We were running late and we still had one flashback to go. We had Nat and Michele change clothes and move into the apartment in the barn. We had to work fast. The sun was setting, changing our light at every minute. We crowded everyone into the room, set up two cameras, and started shooting. Once again our trusty wad of money came into play. We got what we needed and hurried Michele out of there. As we packed up, Doug went off to get some B roll.
Inside the barn
We were all packed up and ready to leave when Doug suggested we take a ride in the paddle boat (there's a paddle boat.) We said okay. It's a 4 person paddle boat and so David, Doug, Nat and I all piled in. It might be built for 4 people, but it tended to float really funny. I felt like we might sink at any moment. Anyway, we took it around the lake a bit and then returned to dry land and our cars.
The pond
I didn't know what kind of stories to expect tonight. The team had gathered at Bobby's Idle hour. I've spent some time in bars and heard a lot of stories in bars. Either you get something magical or some meanderings or a mixture of both. But you always get something colorful.
We started watching and we could tell right off we were getting some great stories. I think as a whole these were probably the best group of stories we got. They sounded lived in, practiced, and sincere. Several stories stood out. And I think the one we choose probably stood out the most. It wasn't the best story structurally (it was more Brandon asking a lot of questions than someone telling a story,) but the content was practically unlike anything we had heard in the project. I think we were all initially taken aback to think that someone would actually tell this story and that the person telling this story had actually performed these actions.
We debated on whether or not to use this story as opposed to what else we had to choose from. It fit our scene pretty well, but so did some of the other stories. Still, we thought it might be interesting to use this story. Luke seemed hesitant. This would be a hard song for him to write, especially with who he was writing for. I was a little hesitant too. I didn't want to use this story without justification and just for shock.
We had to make a decision though. We weighed everything again and decided to go with the story.
It was the story of a man who's niece had been molested. The molester was convicted and served 19 months in prison. The man telling this story waited for the molester to get out of prison and then beat him to death. He served 7 years of a life sentence.
It was pretty heavy content. This was scene 5 and we had definitely wanted conflict here. We needed John to really bring out all his issues. We were to be shooting at Sambuca, a restaurant.
So, this is what we pulled out of the story.
Some wrongdoing has been done - Jordan has "stolen" John's song.
Someone has been punished - We decided to have John be the one who was sent away; a sort of self imposed exile.
There is a trial - Some fans come up to Jordan and John while they sit at the restaurant. John starts listing and insinuating Jordan's faults.
There is waiting for revenge - It would appear as if this is the first time John has really spoken this way about this subject to Jordan. He has been holding it in for a long time.
The punishment is severe - John crucifies Jordan with his words. At one point he basically destroys Jordan (or at least how he defines himself) by accusing him of not being his brother.
There is punishment for these actions - John's exclamations make it all the more harder, and maybe even impossible, for he and Jordan to reconcile.
There is potential that a life sentence will not be served - By the end of Nat's speech he sounds more hurt than angry, this maybe paving the way for some reconciliation.
We went to work. We needed Nat and Brandon, but also fans. Nat suggested we call Theresa Meeker. It sounded like a good suggestion and she was available.
I set to writing a first draft of the scene. After getting one finished I fell asleep. Nat was also working on a draft.
I woke up the next morning and took a look at Nat's draft. I didn't like it. I felt like he wasn't really saying much and his character was mostly talking at Jordan. Nat argued for what he had written and then he performed it for me. It made all the difference. It made me see these words did mean something; especially when spoken by Nat.
We decided to use my buildup and insinuations, then use all of Nat's speech directed at Jordan, and then finish with my two last lines.
It read great. I was really happy with what we had and really upset with myself for jumping so quickly to an unwarranted conclusion. It really opened my eyes (again) to the way Nat wrote and how well he could especially write for this character.
posted by Chad at
12:10 AM
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